If you struggle to stick to a cleaning schedule, or find that somehow, your cleaning routine falls apart the moment you have a real life problem, I want to assure you, it is not you.
I’m willing to bet that whatever resource you are using, it isn’t designed around the way you think, your preferences, your life.
I’m willing to make that bet solely on my personal experience. I have been a homemaker for eleven years now (that went quick), and it is only this year (2026) that I decided I was going to become the expert on MY home, and inform my homemaking with my knowledge, experiences, feelings and desires in mind.
It has taken a few months, but for the first time in my homemaking career, I feel like I am making true progress.
I genuinely believe that the more you personalize your homemaking routine, the more likely it is that you will stick to it. That has been my experience thus far.
And while I will continue to share my experiences and routines, I want to help you create a homemaking routine that centres you and whoever you want to include.
Here is how I got started personalizing my homemaking routine:
Be a Student of Your Own Home
I spent around two weeks jotting down observations, mostly on my Notes app.
The observations were quick notes that I logged when I got the chance, and I made notes about the following sort of thing:
- Natural/unforced daily routine and rhythms
- Energy fluctuations throughout the day for me and my family
- Which chores we did without thinking (and why)
- Which chores we avoided (and why)
- Where clutter seemed to accumulate
- What things made me happy about the house that day
- What things irritated about the house that day
I tried very hard not to feel guilty or judgemental. The goal was simply to observe.
I don’t know if I learned anything new. For example, as a family, we are really good about putting dishes straight in the sink. But the dishwasher was ALWAYS full of clean dishes, and so the stuff in the sink would accumulate until I got irritated and did the dishes.
Making a record of this was helpful. We were able identify behavioural patterns, and have a healthy, blame free conversation about why we all dragged our feet on emptying the dishwasher/washing the dishes.
Identifying patterns and noting how I felt gave me an idea of how I wanted to map out my days and what projects I wanted to work on first.
Habit Stacking Chores
Once I identified what chores we did without prompting, and which ones we were avoiding, I tried stacking them together.
For example, I’m a big fan of trying to do quick chores while the coffee machine is running. We make a huge pot of coffee, and while it’s running I am able to empty the dishwasher, do the first cat litter scoop of the day, and get the toilet scrubbed. Once that coffee is made, I do nothing except read and drink coffee for an hour. It’s like two treats in one!
Did this work for every chore I was avoiding, and did I magically start getting everything done? No. There are still some chores I am figuring out how to fit in. But I am definitely getting more done.
Creating Cleaning Schedules based on Energy Levels
I think this may have been inspired by KC Davies (check out her book How to Keep House While Drowning. It’s a masterpiece in compassionate homemaking), but I created three cleaning schedules:
- Days when I have high energy (and/or additional help)
- Days I have baseline/normal energy
- Days I have zero/low energy (mostly bad mental health days)
I did this because between trying to take care of my own needs, maintain a relationship with my husband, and raise two young kids, I often have days where I look around my house and think ‘where on Earth do I start?’.
Ironically, my favourite of these is my zero battery days schedule. It’s almost like a contract for myself, in which I have pre-decided what the bare minimum will be that day. It saves me having to spend a poor mental health day feeling even more guilty or overwhelmed due to my home.
Think you might need something more? Idea for a mini-quest
If you still aren’t sure where to start, that’s okay! Like I said, it’s taken me eleven years to figure out. I started out with baby steps, and while my steps are still a little wobbly, I’m happy with how far I’ve come.
I’d like to invite you to spend the next three days just jotting down observations about the patterns of your own home.
Feel free to make notes on the things I mentioned above.
But for you to become the expert of your own home, consider the following too:
How much of it is inspired by what others have told you need to do?
How much of it serves the way you want to run a home?
Before you go
Consider signing up for my free monthly newsletter! As well as sharing what I am up to, I share journal prompts, rituals, and quest ideas for you on your homemaking journey too.
As a thank you for signing up to the newsletter, you get a copy of The Domestic Rituals Starter kit (also for free!). It includes some quick habit-stacking ritual ideas for key parts of your day, as well as a guide for setting up your own zero-battery day contract.
Feel free to share your thoughts below, or email me hello@cozymagichome.com. I love getting emails, and respond to all of them personally.
Until the next magical mess,
Amrita
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